Saturday, 17 October 2015

I finally back!! Goodness the last time I wrote something was way back at the end of July. Where has that time gone??

So I guess I need to do a bit of a catch up.

August arrived with me still out of work due to the funding not having come through yet for my English Language Partners job.  The timing was actually good really as I had the opportunity to make another trip down to Christchurch that month and it meant being able to do so without having to take time off work.  More about that later.

It was also good timing to not be working because I got sick - there has been a really nasty flu going around this winter and I got it.  I went from feeling totally fine to suddenly having a cough and lets just say it was down hill from there.  Achy bones, hot and sweating one minute, cold and shivering the next and endless coughing - oh and tired, so very, very, very tired.  So tired in fact that I almost passed out two mornings in a row after having my shower.  Both mornings I woke up feeling pretty good, had breakfast  (this bug did not really seem to affect my appetite) and then went to have my shower.  Well much more than water must of gone down my drain judging by the dark spots dancing before my eyes when I got out of the shower. I think my energy got washed away too.  Sheer will power and the determination to not be found in a naked heap on my bathroom floor kept me upright and finally dressed, but I was wiped out for the rest of the morning.  Thankfully the weather wasn't so great so I just had a couple of do nothing but read and sleep days.  Now I never (well hardly ever) sleep during the day, because if I do I can forget about sleeping at night, so I really was sick cause I slept both day and night no problem.  This getting sick was not good timing at all, it has suddenly started on a Wed afternoon and on the Saturday morning I was meant to be flying to Christchurch.  By Friday I was in two minds - to go or not to go.  On Friday night I was feeling ok so I was still going, by then it was almost to late to pull out anyway.  On Sat morning I felt great, the shower went fine and I raced around getting ready and sorting out last minute things - I probably should have done things a bit slower cause when my friend Diana arrived to pick me up I wasn't feeling so crash hot and the first thing she said to me wasn't 'hi, ready to go?' but 'are you ok cause you don't look so good.'  I really didn't feel so good either - my head was swimming, I was really, really thirsty and I just felt yuck.  It suddenly dawned on my that maybe I was a bit dehydrated as I hadn't really been drinking a lot the last few days and with the high temps had been sweating a lot, as soon as we got to the airport I downed 2 bottle of Powerade.  I don't often drink the stuff but it actually helped a lot and by the time our flight was called (it had been delayed) I was feeling a lot better than I had been.

The trip to Christchurch came about because my friend Diana needed to go to the Burwood Spinal Unit for some tests.  Diana has transverse myelitis and the team from Burwood thought it would be good for her to come down there for a visit.  Now Diana doesn't like to fly and although she can walk short distances with a stick, needs a wheelchair which she needed to bring down with her anyway.  Diana told ACC that she needed a travel companion and I was happy to be that person and ACC were happy to pay - hence a trip down to Christchurch.  The trip down went well - first on and last off was great.  Diana held my hand (without breaking any fingers) going up and coming down and otherwise did really well.  We parted ways once we got to Christchurch - She went to stay the weekend with family and I went to Tim and Yvettes.  It was a lovely relaxing time in Christchurch.  I was feeling way better just very tired still.  It was fun spending time with Asher - we read lots of books together.  I had a wonderful day out with my friend Janice and we had some pampering by going for a haircut and having our nails done.  Diana spend 3 days/3 nights in the hosp and everything was fine and she was discharged in time to catch our afternoon flight on the Thursday home.  That flight went really well and Diana was so confident that she didn't even need to hold my hand at all.

We had flown out and into Palmerston North which worked out really well.  When we got back on the Thursday we went and picked up Noah - Aimee and Tilly had been in and out of hosp that past week as Tilly had become unwell and stopped feeding.  She was diagnosed with a viral upper respiratory infection for which there was nothing they could do and time would heal it.  It had been a rough few days for them with not much sleep so not having the little man around for a few days was a nice break for them.  All went well once we got home - Noah loves being at Oma's.  The weather was lovely so we pottered outside a bit.  Everything however went down hill on the Sunday.  Noah had had a bit of a runny nose and on the Sunday morning I had noticed a wee bit of blood in it, nothing to bad though.  After Church we had lunch and Noah went for is sleep.  He actually went straight to sleep but soon woke up crying.  I went up to see him and I can honestly say it looked like something had been slaughtered in his bed.  There was blood everywhere.  Noah had the worst bleeding nose I've ever seen and it just wouldn't stop.  He was beside himself and very upset about all the blood he was covered in.  Things finally settled down - the bleeding stopped and we cleaned everything up - Noah and the bed and had some  quiet reading books time.  Noah's nose was still oozing a wee bit but nothing too bad.  Suddenly he started to cough and the next thing I knew he had thrown up - into my hand, all the blood that he had swallowed.  He definitely felt way better after that. That night I didn't sleep very well at all, I was half expecting to be woken by Noah crying and finding his nose had started to bleed again, but he made it through the night just fine.

Monday morning he wasn't a very happy chappy - crying, miserable and very, very clingy.  Home to Palmy and Mama we went, which Noah was not happy about at all.  He slept in the car on the way up and once we got to his place he slept again while sitting on my lap.  Aimee gave him some medicine and made a doctor's appointment for him.  Turns out he had a slight ear infection - no antibiotics just pain relief and it would heal with time.  Once the pain relief kicked in he was as right as rain.

Honestly if it's not one thing it's another.

Things did improve - thankfully the funding came through and I was able to restart my 5 hour a week job.  I qualified for a rates rebate which was a huge financial relief.  I was also finally feeling physically better (it took 3 weeks to really get over the bug) and I got stuck in and emptied the compost bins.  That was a huge and heavy going job and I managed to do almost the whole lot by myself.  I ended up having more compost than I needed for my garden so Diana's husband Hillary came to get the extra and did the last wee bit for me as I had had it by then.  We discovered that the compost had been hold up the sides (old pallets) and once it was gone the bins fell apart.  I wasn't too sad really and once Hil had removed the rubbish I installed a smaller plastic bin that is doing the trick quite nicely.  After Labour weekend I plan to start planting some veggies in the garden.  Today I noticed that the first asparagus spears have made an appearance - yum!

The whole job thing really got me down in Aug/Sept - so many applied for and nothing.  It gets very disheartening and tiring too.  I had a meeting with my Work and Income case manager and told her I was over it all.  I didn't want to apply for anymore jobs for the rest of the year as I had enough.  We had a talk and then she took me to have a chat with the work broker and they both encouraged me to keep applying for anything that appealed and blow me down I got 2 job interviews within 2 weeks of each other.  One was for a 15 hours a week job and the other was for a 40 plus hours a week job.  One was a very casual interview and the other was a very proper interview with some really hard questions.  I got neither of them and having processed that it's actually ok.  The fact that I got 2 interviews has been a HUGE boost to my confidence.  The Lord knew exactly what I needed and He provided.

The 15 hour a week job would not have seen me financially better off due to being taxed at a higher rate as it would be classed as a secondary job (the benefit being my primary income, even if it is still only a few dollars) and there was also the daily cost of traveling to Foxton, it was also a sole charge position which made me realize that because I live alone I actually need to be around other people in my job, also the owner guy looked very much like someone I know and that would just have been a bit weird.  I was 2nd choice for that job which was nice to hear.  The one who got it had more experience dealing with freighting companies.

The 40 plus hours a week job would have been full on - 7.45am - 5.30pm 5 days a week.  I would of coped but it would have been a shock to the system for the first few weeks.  It would have been home, feed the dog, eat something, probably anything that was simple and easy and then bed, forget the washing, vacuuming, ironing etc - lol!

I have since been back to see my case manager and she was very please for me that I had had 2 interviews.  She was please too that from them I have been able to really work out what I think will work for me.  She encouraged me to find a good balance - to be financially free yet still have time for family, grandchildren, friends and the other things that fill my life - I guess that's it I need to find a balance between working and having a life and I know that God has the right job lined up for me that will give me that balance.

I haven't stopped applying for jobs and this week sent in an application for a job at the local Library.  Just after Roy died I thought about doing some study and library study really appealed.  I even enrolled but pulled out as the timing just didn't feel right with so much other stuff including grieving still going on.  Maybe this could be the stepping stone to revisiting that.  I covert your prayers.

The other good news is that up until Christmas I have probably 5 maybe 7 more hours a week at work.  National office wants all centers to go digital which means scanning in and linking all our records (learner and volunteer information forms etc) to the database.  It'll be a big job to start with, but I'm happy to do it.  I'm hoping to start in the  next week or so.  I am also going to be looking after both Noah and Tilly again as from Monday, it'll mean 2 trips to Palmy a week as Aimee needs me on a Thursday too.  So the next weeks leading up to Christmas are going to be full on and probably (hopefully) fly by.

In other news - the monthly card making group is still going strong.  For the last few weeks we have been making Christmas cards.  I gave the Rawleigh shop a good spring clean and rearrange. I have finally added some of the other craft items that I have been making.  It now looks great and smells amazing thanks to the scented candles I've made.  I had a wonderful day this past week down in Wellington for a chicks day with my dear friends Jackie and Stella.  We had a wonderful time as we always do chatting, shopping, laughing and unbaggaging.  It is always a blessing to be able to spend time with these two wonderful ladies and just what I needed to recharge my battery.

As Murphy's Law would have it I decided to clean out and put away my fire stuff. We had been having such lovely warm days and even the evenings were mild.  Well no sooner had I done that then the weather changed and it cooled down again.  I have as yet not succumbed and relit the fire - instead in the evening I put on a jersey, close the curtains and light all my candles - I'm dutch after all ;0)

Well there are the highlights of the last few months - well most of them anyway.   Hopefully it wasn't too boring a read.

I still believe that the Lord has great plans for my future and I wait (as patiently as possible) for His timing.  Life is good and I am blessed daily - sometimes I just forget to see and appreciate them.  Life is too short to let yourself get burdened by baggage.  We need to enjoy each and every day we have been given and be thankful for the blessings. Things that have happened in the past need to be left there.  You can't change them and if you keep dragging them along they will eventually trip you up.  Let go, stop looking behind and look forward and most importantly look up to Him who will supply all your needs because when all else fails you can trust in Him.

Thanks for spending time with me via this blog.

Till next time.

Love and blessings